"We never give up on family." is something my mum always tells me when things get rough.
I know a lot of families have it a lot worse, and man oh man I do LOVE my family, but we have our issues, and this year has definitely been a trial of my faith when it comes to family.
I heard someone say once, that you'll probably always love your family, but that doesn't mean you'll always like them.
I LOVE my family. Really. Sometimes I don't always like them, because of things they say, things they do, and ya know, things. But no matter what, I'll always love them.
Its really hard to see people in your family do self-destructive things and have no. idea. what they are doing. Honestly, what your family does, how they act, things they say, do to themselves, it REALLY affects you. At least it does to me.
(You know how like when your mum is in a bad mood, most likely EVERYONE is in a bad mood. It's honestly how it is with your whole family. If someone in your home is in a bad mood or something, it really sets the mood in your homes and family, but that's just how I feel.)
I feel a little dumb that I never realized how my actions and the actions of others in my family can really affect us as a family and I'm definitely going to work on being my absolute best so that I can help to set a good environment in my family.
I feel so blessed to have such an incredible family. We definitely have our fair share of issues and often times I let them bring me down, but all in all, I really am so blessed to have such an incredible family. It makes me sad that I'm not that close with a lot of my cousins and other family members.
Over the last couple months its just hit me hard that I've kind of become distant from a lot of my family in my lifetime, and don't really even know most of my immediate family members. I'm 100% NOT okay with this.
Lately I've just felt really proud of my family, we've had a lot of cousins go on missions, and come home and even if I don't really know them that well, I just feel so proud to call them family.
I feel so blessed to be sealed to my family for all eternity. Honestly how lucky are we that we can be sealed to our families for FOREVER and EVER. So. Incredibly. Lucky.
Like I said this year has been really rough. at times I didn't want to be in my own home because I felt so attacked by certain members of my family, or their actions just really brought me down. I'm sure I've made others feel like that before. Family is supposed to be there for you ALWAYS, they're supposed to be there for eternity, forever and ever and when you feel like they're not there, and they don't love you, or they don't care, it really is not fun.
I know for sure in the past I've not always been the greatest, I've definitely caused a lot of grief for my family, and now that I've sorta been "in their shoes" I wish I could take it all back but I can't. All I can do it do my best to BE the one that is always there, the one that will always love you no matter what. Because you need your family to be there. You need them to make you feel safe. It's my family, its a little bit broken, but still good.
Right now I feel really determined to love and like my family unconditionally. I've been trying a little here and there, and it's definitely not easy, but I'm going to get there.
I think I probably made it sound like I have huge family issues, which I don't, my family is great, it really is, but one thing I know is you never give up on family, if you have a problem, no matter how big or small, you fix it. Because "Ohana means family. Family means nobody gets left behind."
xoxo, Wesleigh
