PNW Road Trip

So I have decided to post about my road trip, because I can. Do I need a better reason? And I have a plethora of pictures....and when I put them on my phone from my camera, they turned into really crappy pictures, so bear with me ;)

A little history: We spontaneously decided to go on a road trip to the grand pacific northwest. We would be gone for like 5 days, which is mostly driving, ew, and we would go to Oregon, and Washington. And that was the plan.

Basically there were 5 girls on this road trip, and no men or parental supervision. GIRL POWER Y'ALL. It was myself, two of my older sisters (they're adopted, I swear), and one of my sister's friend, and my sister's friend's friend. And we were squished like peas into my older sisters Pontiac G6 named Saphira.

I started off by getting like 30 minutes of sleep because I went to bed super late because I was too lazy to pack and that plus a whirlwind of panic and anxiety attacks and longing and nostalgia for my ocean. Therefore I did not sleep, and was singing Fun like a madman. IT WAS GREAT YA KNOW.

After we all got tightly squeezed into the car it was like 4:30/5 and we decided to make a run to Walmart, the only open store in Cache Valley to get some technology to play our music. DO YOU REALIZE HOW HARD IT IS TO GET SOME ASSISTANCE AT A WALMART AT 4:30 AM. SO HARD. Once we got our techno we ran out to our car. As I was running to my car, I heard some laughing and I was like...."Um creepy" so I looked back to the Walmart and to my surprise there were like 15 Walmart employees sitting on that patio furniture stuff that they display at the front of the store drinking sodas. The heck. THAT was why it was so hard to get some assistance guys.

Anyways. So we started rollin' and THE SUNRISE WAS PERFECT. Although I was driving so I couldn't fully enjoy it.

The drive was beautiful. From the construction worker that picked up that fallen over cone so gracefully at like 6am, to the beautiful things like this waterfall. 

And this super rainy windy river gorge. So perfect, so intense. Especially when the winds are extremely high and you have a flat tire.....and you are trying to drive while trying to talk to the auto store on the phone but you can't hear them because of the wind and the car noises and yeaaaaah. SO FUN. 

And can we just acknowledge how super attractive everyone was when they slept? ;) I am adorable when I sleep, too bad I don't sleep in the car ;) And no, I'm no posting a picture. I value my life. 

Yeah so the drive was good and all. Until we got a flat tire and had to have 2 tires changed which took like 1 and 1/2 hours and our life savings. Actually I didn't pay anything, make that THEIR life savings.

So after eating Chipotle for the first time and being totally incapable of pronouncing it, and charging our phones at Starbucks, we got rolling to the OCEAN, with a quick whirl through Portland. Like literally we got of on the wrong exit and we ended up driving through the part of Portland by the university. I LIKE PORTLAND. It was cool. Lots of hippies, and all the wild roses, I approve so good. 

After all that ish, we made our way to the coast for reals. THIS IS MY FAVORITE DRIVE EVER OKAY. Through the walls of the Oregon rain forest, with the smell the Ocean lingering in the air. PERFECTION. 

*hyperventilates* 

Basically we got to Cape Lookout State Park at like....10pm. A massive storm was blowing through and it was SO windy, and SO cold, and SO rainy, and we were like, "No. Let's go home" Because we are from hot dry Utah, and I was wearing shorts. Pretty much. Not to mention, the first thing the ranger told us was, "Oh, you are way out in the open, so make sure your tent is staked in really well and you have a good rain fly so you don't get rained on." But he was bearded and super cheerful about it all, so that was great. When we were driving to our tent site, literally everyone was in long pants and down coats....I felt sorta unprepared. ;) And some chick in the bathroom (which was super warm btw) was like, "I REALLY hope tomorrow is better, because last night was a nightmare." Thanks. Thanks a lot. ;) But we got in our warm tent and only two of us got rained on (myself and my sister ;) ). 

I think God must love us a lot, because the next morning we woke up to partly cloudy skies, and a light drizzle, which cleared up to be a sunny, 60 degree day. :) I WAS SO EXCITED TO SEE THE OCEAN I WAS LIKE JUMPING UP AND DOWN. Because we got to our ten tsite so late, we actually couldn't SEE our surroundings, or the ocean, because the view was blocked by a dune. But we woke up and the campground was beautiful. Truly. 

And then I ran/skipped to the ocean waves and danced through the foamy fingers and laughed and cried and yes that happened and oh man, it felt so good to be home. HAPPY HEART Y'ALL.

LOOK. OCEAN WE LOVE YOU. 

AND LOOK HOW GORGEOUS IT WAS. IS. IT IS. 

And there were waterfalls on the beach, and it was pretty magical.

Speaking of magical. THIS.

And the clouds were reflecting on the wet beach and yeah, I was sorta in heaven.

Anyways. My heart was super happy and content. And it felt so good. Next stop, The Oregon Coast Aquarium. HOLLA. 

Let's flashback. Left: fashionable childhood me, (honestly I don't know why those were ever in style) in total awe of the magical sea life, Right: me still in awe of the magical sea life. 

See? Nothing has changed there. I love love the marine life, and I could spend HOURS at the aquarium. I always have, I always will.

After the aquarium, as we were driving back to our campsite, we saw the results of a really really bad car wreck. One mini van was crashed into the side of the forest, and one van was flipped over on it's head. I kept expecting to see someone seriously injured but all I saw were there suitcases and souvenirs thrown out of the car, they had tow trucks there to move the cars, so ambulances were loooong gone. Oregon's windy roads make accidents lots more likely. It was tragic and I couldn't help but wondering if the people were okay. I'm so grateful we stayed safe, it's crazy to think that at any moment that can happen to any of us. Anyways. 

After we got back, we packed up and went to Oceanside Beach. Brace yourself for a looooot of pictures because this is my home. Basically the 19 minute drive was me dying of feels. Like. Just look at how freaking cute all the houses are. Can I just live there please? 

We also went and stalked the house my family used to rent. SO MANY FEELS. I just wanted to be in the house eating granola and drinking blackberry tea with my family. :( BUT. The people staying in the house definitely noticed us stalking, and the waved. I wonder if they would have given us a tour, I would have asked ;) 

Literally the view from the house is perfect and I want to buy it and live there. Blackberry blossoms, just yes.

Anyways. So after a good dose of stalking, we went down to Oceanside Beach to roast hot dogs and eat sauerkraut and explore the beach.  I was literally so happy to be there. Tears might have been shed people. But a major plus to just being on the beach, is being there during sunset, and it was AMAZING.

Climbing rocks + the ocean = happy happy happy. ^_^ 

After chilling on the beach, we went back to our campground and....slept. BUT THE STARS WERE AMAZING. And that was great. Clear Oceanside skies and lots of stars makes for perfection.

The next morning we woke up early to head down to Oceanside for low tide. Seashells and tide pools ya'll. We got a lot of seashells, and found this little guy...

(my pictures aren't actually THAT bad of quality, I just pulled them off my phone and they turned out crappy) 

And tide pools are seriously the coolest.

And sunrise on the beach, also the coolest. 

I seriously loved seeing all the houses and the sun rising. It brought back a loaaad of memories. Happy ones.

 After that, we went back to the campsite and packed up. Into our tiny car. It was FULL to the brim and it barely fit. #Expertpackers 

Once that was all done, we head towards Cape Meares to see the lighthouse. The VIEW was great, and I was having flashbacks of childhood me running through the woods there. 

And once we explored there, and hugged trees, we got ice cream from Tillamook. You might have had Tillamook ice cream, but you have not lived until you have had fresh Tillamook ice cream right from the factory. Thne headed along highway 101 to Washington. HIGHWAY 101 IS THE MOST PERFECT ROAD IN THE WORLD. HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE THIS A LOT. Like, you can't complain driving on highway 101, it's magical ;) 

Another thing Oregon/Washington has a lot of, is freaking awesome bridges. 

LOOK WE MADE IT TO WASHINGTON. I'm actually really sad that we never got a picture or the "Welcome to Oregon" sign, I missed seeing it every time. :(

So basically we were staying with complete strangers in Washington. HAH. But they were super super nice, and that was great. We didn't actually get there until 10pm or later, and I don't have pictures of any other parts of the 4-ish hour drive because I was on my phone the whole time. :/

The next day we got up and it was nice to sleep in a house although I was still in my sleeping bag on the floor. CLEARLY, I would have rather been camping. ;) First place we headed was to catch a ferry! Whoo! We had a little bit of a mix-up and ended up waiting for 1-2 hours. Ferry lines are hilarious. It's a HUGE line of cars up the highway, and it moves slowly, so basically people just get out of their cars and hangout, and when the line would move, they would just walk. It was hilarious to me, even though it really isn't. ;) And there was this adorable little Indian baby girl that we waved and, and she waved back, her parents had no idea ;) I also waved at a group of guys chilling at their VW van getting ready to go scuba diving, they weren't super friendly :( In Utah people wave at strangers, I guess they don't do that in Washington ;) 

Once you drive onto the ferry, you can get out of your car and walk around, and it was the BEST. I was in heaven. I love boats, and I love the ocean. I didn't get a picture of it, but the water was FULL of jelly fish, and you could see them, and that was super dope.

I was basically in heaven.

When the ride ended we found this super cute Gluten Free bakery and just HAD to go check it out and buy lots of stuff ;) After that we drove to Port Angeles so one of the girls could go see her family, and while she hung with her family, we went to this AMAZING cafe called Cafe New Day. I am no where NEAR a foodie, food does not bring me joy, and it basically all tastes similar, but this was probably the BEST gluten free food that I have ever had in my entire life. So good. 

After all that we went to Silverdale, WA to meet up with some of my sister's friends at the mall. While they were talking, the rest of us went to Barnes and Nobles. Obviously. I read kids books, and bought a reprint of the US Army Survival Guide, typical. ;) I could spend hours in a bookstore, it's a problem. And after that, we embarked to get back on the ferry. We waited to forever again, and there was a jazz band playing, and I hate jazz ;) So basically on this side of the bay, you pay for the ferry, and go park in a parking lot and wait to board the ferry. Everyone is sitting on their cars, and drinking coffee and stuff, and I like that vibe. And then we got back on the ferry, and the sunset was pretty great. 

The next morning, we woke up early, packed up, and headed home. YAY. I love traveling, and road trips, but going home is always the best feeling EVER.

On our way back, we drove past Mount Rainier, I actually have no idea which mountain is which, there were so many in the distance, and it was hecka confusing. But I'm pretty sure that the sign knew what it was talking about ;) 

With our car full of sand, and our hearts full of memories, we pulled up to the curb in front of my house. We were all almost exploding when we got into Utah, because we were so excited to be home. I mean, these people are great, but 40-ish hours in a car with them and I was more than ready to be home. 

Anyways. It was great. I'm super glad I went, it felt so good to go home to Oregon, man I love that place :) It was definitely a good fix to my extreme wanderlust. Life is good y'all. :) 

(apologies for the length, and excess of pictures, and overall bad grammar, you're welcome)

Hi.

Hi. My name is Wesleigh.

I like sweater weather. The kind of weather that you can wear a big knit sweater, jeans, and boots. I don't like the heat. The hot. The heat hot. Yuck.

I like beaches. But not the type of beaches that people take off all their clothes for. I like the type of beaches where the wind blows your hair into a wild mess, and the types of beaches that you can smell the non existent rain in the air, and cuddle up with a blanket and watch the sunset.

I like the mountains. I like hiking to high places, because the feeling of euphoria when you reach the summit is something that can never truly be explained or replaced.

I like the feeling of adrenaline. Story: you probably didn't know that rock climbing scares the HECK out of me. In fact just thinking about it now makes me feel a whirlwind of both stunting fear and excitement.

I like vintage things and I like mismatching colors and patterns because I do my own thing. Funny story: When I was little I never matched, and yeah my mom let me dress myself, and when we would go places, my family would tell people that I was an orphan they adopted. Fun right?

I believe in rebelling and standing strong in your beliefs.

I also believe in Christ and without it I would be lost like a brand new father on the baby isle at the supermarket.

I also believe in making no sense. Ever.

I love people. I don't love being with people, or being around them, or people in general....but people fascinate me, their personalities, their passions, their quirks, and I like people watching as I'm driving down the highway or what not. It's a weird thing I know. But I am always amazed by how much love I can feel for a complete stranger I passed on the street.

With that being said, I also hate people. Introvert problems right?

I have a really weird sense of humor. Actually I blame it on non functional brain. It's normal.

But all the time my mind is a muddled mess.

Actually, I really feel bad for the people who speak to me in any form of conversation, because I make no sense and they've probably checked me off as mentally insane.

MOVING ON. I said my brain was a mess didn't I?

I love life. And regardless of how I may feel sometimes, I really, really love it. It makes me happy inside. Simply the fact that I get to live in this postcard worthy place. I'm very lucky.

I also love lightning and thunder storms. I am always such a big nerd about it. Like run outside and jump up and down and dance in the rain while proclaiming how amazing this is and oh my gosh the sheer profoundness of this universe. Think about....it's like giant dominoes crashing together in the sky producing giant sparks of light that show themselves for a thousandth of a second....mind blown.

I also really like sunsets. It's like the final hurrah for the day, leaving us in the pale moonlight. The sun leaving to spread it's warmth somewhere else....creating painted skies, casting showdows in the trees and leaving the mountains majestic and bold, in the last evening light. They are beautiful and they leave me in awe of the vastness and amazingness of this world. 

Did I mention that I love the universe?

my greatest fear

I have this incredible survival instinct. I watch an "Armageddon" movie and immediately get the STRONGEST desire to be able to take down an entire army single handed. It's a dream of mine.

Get me really into a game or capture the flag, or ghost in the graveyard, or humans versus zombies, and I go ballistic. I. Must. Win.

But you see, I AM a strong person, I always have been, but my insides don't seem to want to be strong. And I hate that ya know, because I NEED to be strong, I do, and the fact that I "could" pick up a terminal illness scares me....I really don't want that....I was made for much more. But making your dreams come true is hard ya know, and sometimes it's easier to just wish a terminal illness upon yourself, that'd be easy right? False.

There is SO SO much that I want to do with my life. Really my heart could explode and my eyes could become a hurricane just by THINKING about all the things my heart longs to do. And I don't want to waste a single second. But making dreams come true is hard isn't it?

My sister texted me this the other day.....and I guess you could say that I like it, maybe even a lot.

"Oh my gosh. What is you wake up some day, and you're 65, or 75, and you never got your memoir or novel written; or you didn't go swimming in warm pools and oceans all those years because your thighs were too jiggly and you had a nice big comfortable tummy; or you are just so strung out on perfectionism and people pleasing that you forgot to have a big juicy creative life, or imagination and radical silliness and staring off into space like when you were a kid? It's going to break your heart. Don't let this happen."

- Anne Lamott 

Living a lesser life is easy is it not? I mean. It's a lot easier to just buy a bunch of junk food from Walmart and live on that and grow a really nice belly and it's easy to love your love handles, and it's really easy to sit on the couch eating potato chips and watching America's Next Top Model, and it's really easy to make fun of people, and it's really easy to have a pitty-party for yourself and justify not helping others, and it's really easy to not do your homework, and it's really easy to make excuses, and it's really easy to not make your dreams come true. If I don't...it'll break my heart. 

But I have a not-so-much-of-a-secret-to share with you.....the greatest things in life are NOT easy. Nope. Getting a six-pack is not easy, being patient and kind with everyone is not easy, serving others is not easy, and MAKING YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE IS NOT EASY. But oh it's so worth it. 

Do you know the parable of the talents? In case you don't, here it is.... "Jesus told the story of a master who gave each of his three servants a sum of money. The amounts were set according to each servant’s previously demonstrated capabilities. The man then left for a long time. When he returned, he asked each of these servants to report what he had done with the money. The first two servants revealed they had doubled his investment. “Well done, thou good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord,” was the master’s reply. The third servant then came trembling before his master. He had already heard what the others had reported and knew that he could not give a similar report. “I was afraid,” the servant said, “and went and hid thy talent in the earth” The master was upset. “Thou wicked and slothful servant,” he said. Then he commanded, “Take therefore the talent from him, and give it unto him which hath ten talents” The Savior then gave the interpretation of the parable: Those who obtain other talents receive more talents in abundance. But those who do not obtain other talents shall lose even the talents they had initially." 

I feel like God gave us each the greatest gift of all....a physical body, and a chance to live a life here on earth. How would you feel if you gave someone a gift and they just trashed it, and didn't care about it, and were like, "whatever, you only live once anyways!" (btw you don't only live once, you live every single day, every second, minute, hour, etc.). How would you feel? I think you would be sad....you would feel sad and hurt. And I think that's how God feels when we don't live up to our true potential in life, and when we settle for the easier, lesser path.

I don't want that. And that is my greatest fear.

My greatest fear is that one day I'll wake up and I'll have never made my dreams come true. That'll I'll have made SO many excuses and so many justifications that I got sucked into the desolate vortex of "people-who-settled-for-lesser-easy-lives" 

That I'll never have gotten married or have had that big beautiful family of mine; that I'll never have traveled the world; or climbed the highest mountains; or swam in the ocean; or never have changed someones life; or never made my dreams come true, and that'll I'll never had returned the gift God gave in the way that he would want. 

Guys. Don't get sucked into that addicting and cumbersome vortex. It's comfortable. It's dangerous. It's blinding. Don'g go there. 

You. Are. Worth. More. Than. That.

Nelson Mandela, a wise and inspiration man, once said.....

"I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear."

We all have fears ya know...but we can not let them blind us and trap us in their treacherous webs. We must break free and conquer our fears. You are loved, you have immeasurable worth, you have great potential, go above and beyond and make those dreams come true. :) 

everything and nothing at all

Everything and nothing at all. I think that pretty much sums up everything in my everyday, weekly, monthly, life.

In my journal(s) I am constantly writing about new things that I "think" I want to do with my life and careers I "think" I want to go into and where I want to go and blah blah and it's really exhausting.

It kinda looks something like this, but times 50.

I am CONSTANTLY obsessing over my life, I'm always trying to figure out the absolute BEST option, and if I want to get there I have to be perfect and do everything right so that I can have the perfect life that doesn't even exist. And that's really stupid ya know. Because I am so obsessed with figuring out who I am and who I am to become that I forget to actually be ME and just let it flow. 

What's even crazier is that there really are SO many things that I could really see myself doing, that I feel really passionate about.....yet....a lot of them have me both experiencing a stampede of butterflies while my heart is beating at totally irregular intervals and feeling completely overwhelmed and sick to my stomach. 

Sometimes I think I know what I want to do. But I don't. I really, really, don't know what I am going to do with my life. 

And I don't think it helps when people are CONSTANTLY asking you what you want to do with your life, etc., etc. 

Because let's be honest does ANYONE know what they truly want to do with their lives? Maybe bits and pieces, or maybe they just have a really together life. But I don't.

I wish people would stop asking, because you don't have to know, and you don't need the pressure. No on does. You don't need to be pressure into who you are "supposed" to be.

And guess what? It's OKAY to not know what you are doing with your life. You have your WHOLE life to figure that out, live a little.

I'm Wesleigh. I want to do everything, I want to be everything, I want to see everything, and yada yada. But in all honestly, I don't want to do anything. Nothing. Nothing at all.

But one thing I do know, All I want is this.......

Simplicity 

Simplicity is bliss isn't it. As much as I would like to become a doctor and travel throughout Africa saving lives, and as much as I would like to have my own successful business, and as much as I would like to make millions and have a big house and stuff......really all I want is simplicity. 

I want to do nothing. Everything within reach. But nothing.

Lately I've met, heard about, a lot of families that seem to have nothing....ya know....they have tiny old houses, filled with furniture that looks like it was probably thrifted, hand-me-down clothes, beater cars that they converted to run on grease, a list full of places they've lived throughout the world, happy smiling children, and overall......a simple life. Looking at them you would think they have nothing really.....but in fact...they have everything. Simplicity IS bliss.

I want my everything, nothing really at all, but everything to me. 

I really just don't know. Don't know exactly what my "everything and nothing at all" actually is, and right now I want to go scream my lungs out because I can't seem to get a grip on life and that is really hard. But I have a glimpse of what I want in life, something simple, something that makes me happy. Something obviously not perfect.....but something simple and everything to me. :) 

And right now I'm going to try to get some part of my life a little.....simpler. 

And that made absolutely no sense, but sometimes I have really profound thoughts that just can't be written down or even thought clearly. It's normal. 

Within Reach: Started from the bottom now we're here

The other night it was about 12pm. I was sitting in the basement chilling with my dad. We started talking about some people we know who are struggling with their marriage and then we started talking about my parents divorces and then we started talking about my dads ex father in law and his successful life and how he got there and then other people's successful lives and how they got there. (I feel like you just learned a lot about my life in that once sentence but you didn't.)

It really sparked something in me.

So my dad knew (because he is now deceased) the guy who started the Orange County, California garbage company. An incredible entrepreneur and billionaire. Basically. He wasn't rich growing up and at 13, he and his older brother left home. They started a business by charging people to pick up their garbage in the back of their truck, and it grew to this multi-billion dollar company that collects all of Orange County's garbage and uses highly advanced technology.

How the heck did he get there?! That's what I wanted to know.

Steve Jobs dropped out of school. Bill Gates dropped out of school. Etc.

How come some of the most successful people in the world didn't even get much of an education!?

My dad went on to tell me stories of the richest people in the world and how they got there. He told me a story of a girl he knew in high school who grew up in a shack with an outhouse in a really really messed up family who was befriended by a girl who helped her to realize her true potential, and later became a doctor.

I kept saying, "Hoooow?" Because I really wanted to know. How does that work. How can someone go from nothing to so much.

My dad told me something really profound I guess. He said that those people like the garbage guy in Orange County, Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, etc, are TOO creative for the system. The system being the public schooling system, limitations of the world, etc. They are SMARTER than everyone else. Their IDEAS far out weigh the system. That's kind of crazy. They broke through the limitations of the world and reached for dreams.

But what about people like that girl who grew up in a shack with an outhouse? Someone took her under their wing and loved her, and helped her to realize her TRUE potential and helped her to reach for her dreams.

None of these people started out with much. In fact some might say that what they did was impossible. They started from the bottom and made it to the top.

I sorta wondered why I couldn't be like those people, but you know the great thing about living? ANYTHING. Absolutely anything that you want is within your reach.

Within reach....does that not blow your mind or what even?

Those people got to the top, made their dreams come true, overcame their obstacles, realized their true potential, and other stuff.

My voca/grammar is really strong right now, can you tell? MY THOUGHTS ARE STARS I CANNOT FATHOM INTO CONSTELLATIONS OKAY.

Anyways. I said it sparked something in me right? Well it really did. It REALLY really did.

Life has been really hard, I mean it's always hard. I have a lot of problems in my life and I'm learning to to not think of them as obstacles that I have to struggle over but more like mini trampolines that will only make me go higher. Holla for great analogies.

So yeah life is hard but it's SO GOOD. I have hard days/times that make me question why I want to be here....then I have those really wonderful moments where I remember how much I love life and how worth it is.

You know it seems like hard times are followed by really good times. Thus the mini trampoline analogy ;)

I've come to embrace my struggles and not let them drag me down, instead I am reaching for my dreams and realizing how achievable they are.

My life lately has gone something like this: midnight longboarding sesh/learning how to longboard, filling the back of my truck with blankets and pillows and stargazing, random hikes, tan lines, and ups and downs, bike rides, and successful runs, and good music, and laughs, and climbing, and life is good okay. It's just really hard but really good and it feels so good to go out and makes dreams come true.

Nothing is impossible.

And lately I've just really been realizing that everything I want is within my reach. And that feels good.