Dream in Reality

The other night. I was feeling insecure, and overwhelmed. Nothing new there.

And I was sitting at my computer, studying.

It was like 9:30, and my sister came in and said that she and some people from her singles ward were going up to the towers, and asked if I wanted to come.

I was like, "Yeah, um, probably not, I have school." so she walked away.

I was like torn between going or not. I mean, they are all "return-missionaries" or around that age, so it's kinda weird when a 16 year old comes and hangs with them. You feel? But I tend to do it quite a bit.

SO ANYWAYS. I'm taking forever to get to the point.

I was torn, and finally, I shut my laptop, and was like, "screw this, I'm going on an adventure."

She hadn't left yet so I went with her. And OH MY GOODNESS. I am so glad I did.

The towers is this SUPER SUPER cool place at the mouth of our biggest canyon, above the water plant.

It's kinda a "hangout place" if you wanna call it that.

There is graffiti literally everywhere, and beer cans everywhere. But trust me, it's SO cool.

You have to walk up the mountain to it, it's not super steep, but it takes you up a ways.

But why is is so cool? Because it's a concrete JUNGLE. And I have no pictures, because it was 10pm, so you won't understand how COOL it is.

Some people were freaking doing PARKOUR, and I was like. New goal. New freaking goal.

And there were SO MANY other cool things, but I it's hard to explain.

BUT ANYWAYS.

The whole time I just felt like a FREAKING DAUNTLESS WARRIOR (which is kinda who I am through and through) and it felt so good.

It felt so good to do daring things, to live on the edge, to run FREE.

I do stuff like that all the time. But with it being finals, it just really hit me how much I love to be free, and to wander, and to try new things, and challenge myself, and break through restrictions, and routine, and all that shiz.

And mostly, it hit me how much I HATE (strong word intended) structure, and routine.

Doing the same thing everyday.

Learning the same things.

Just ew.

I am a nomad. I can't stand that. Really I cannot.

This is my last semester here at WA. And I have really loved it so much.

My first year was SO great. My second year not so much. Which is entirely my fault.

But I did my time, and I grew, and I learned SO much, but I am ready to move on. I am ready to try new things.

I am SO ready to break free and truly be myself without restrictions (okay there will definitely be restrictions #Stillliveathome).

I am READY to become confident in the things I never have been.

To throw this burden off my shoulders.

I am ready to make my dreams REALLY come true.

No more "someday".

I'm ready to just take a step back and dream in reality.

Sometimes all you have to do is forget school, and just go. Forget routine, just go.

Just freaking go.

I promise you it feels SO good.

It doesn't have to be Everest man.

It could be running down the middle of the street barefoot. Anything really.

Just live free. Dream in reality. And be HAPPY with who you are.

That is all the ramblings I have today, didn't make sense, but that's alright. My mind is a buzz, and I like it that way. :)